I am packing some books in my office in the church. I know it might seem kind of early since I will be here until April 2nd, but we have a busy schedule so I decided to spend some time packing some books. I really like my books. In a weird way they are a security to me. Maybe too much so.
As I pack, I am beginning to realize that I wont be a pastor any longer. Well, at least for a while as we navigate the church planting option. I wont preach on Sunday morning, which I love to do, I wont have a church office to go and read and study. I won't be the pastor in the parish, forming sermons, praying for parishoners, etc. I am sad. I am beginning to grieve.
I have been a pastor for just 7 years, but my identity is wrapped up in it. Now I will be a chaplain, which is awesome and will be fulfilling, but it isn't the same. For sure I am gaining something in this new challenge, but for sure I am losing something.
I don't know if it is the realization of what is happening...the many books that are reminding me of my calling...or Coldplay on the stereo, but I am definitely sad.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Ben, I'll be praying for you. Count on that. I totally understand your feelings. I went through that same kind of thing three years ago and know how hard it is. May God give you grace and peace during this time of transition.
Thanks Bryan. Change is exciting and it sucks. I feel both sides. It is good to know I have friends praying.
May God's peace be yours during this time.
Post a Comment